Clank! Boom! Crash!
"Oh, shh__.", a frustrated Mulder said
under his breath as he lay on his living room floor.
Now how was he supposed to clean out his fish
tank?! The pots and pans he was going to use to get his fish out of
the tank had broken the glass jar (filled with water of course) that
somehow he was going to put his fish in!
Mulder laid on the floor for a few more moments
... What was he thinking of?! Taking the shelf apart to get to the
tank? And why was he so stupid to have put such a big tank on the
He rolled over onto his stomach and crawled over
to the broken jar... realizing now that the water was soaking up into
his sweatpants, he stood up. Since he didn't have a vaccuum cleaner,
he decided to go ask Krycek for one.
POUND! POUND! POUND!
"Krycek! Open up!", exclaimed Mulder,
Opening his door, wearing only a bathrobe, Krycek
asked, "What now, Mulder?"
"I need to use your vaccuum."
"You mean you don't have your own?"
Mulder pushes Krycek out of the way and starts
opening and closing doors frantically .... he enters the bathroom.
"Hey! Krycek! Do you need your bathtub?"
asked Mulder seriously. He was dipping his hands in the water to check
the temperature ... seemed just fine for what he had in mind.
"Um, considering I'm about to take a bath,
"Hold that thought!", snapped Mulder,
pointing his finger at Krycek. Then he walked out of his apartment.
A few minutes later, Mulder returns with a pot
full of his fish.
"Mulder, what in the name of God, are you
Mulder was gently dumping his fish into the bathtub.
And waving at them. He turns to Krycek and simply explains, "Gotta
clean the tank."
At that, Krycek leaves his bathroom and plops
down on his couch. Why is Mulder like this? Was he dropped on his
head as a child? Or is this some weird idea of the Cigarette-Smoking
Mulder runs through the living room on his way
out ... on his way to clean the tank. "Watch my fish!" He
slams the door shut.
"Oh yeah ... I'll watch your fish.",
After awhile, Krycek stood up and went to find
his fish net and old fish tank. After washing all of the dust out
of his tank, he carefully got Mulder's fish out of his bathtub. Then
spent a little time wondering why Mulder needed a vaccuum cleaner
to clean his out. He sat on his couch staring at the three fish for
quite a long while .... and suddenly burst out laughing at a though
He stood up and went to the bathroom and pulled
the plug from the drain and watched the water empty.
After getting dressed and finding his vaccuum
cleaner, he headed over to Mulder's to see if he needed help. Since
most everyone enters Mulder's apartment, he didn't bother to knock,
he just walked right in.
Hearing the door open, Mulder yells, "Be
careful where you step! There's glass everywhere!"
"Here's the vaccuum.", said Krycek,
not as confused anymore, and kinda relieved.
"Great, just vaccuum up my mess." demanded
Krycek proceeded to do so and after about thirty
minutes of showing Mulder the correct way to clean a fish tank, Mulder
was ready to bring his fish home. As he and Krycek walked out, Mulder
put his arm around Krycek and thanked him for being so helpful. As
they entered Krycek's apartment, Mulder notices the fish on the living
"You got fish too?! My fish and your fish
can be 'fishy pals'!"
"Oh. My. God.", thought Krycek, "Did
I really hear Mulder say 'fishy pals'?"
Mulder entered the bathroom , pot ready to gather
up his fish ... but wait a minute ... there is no water in the bathtub,
and no fish to be seen!
"Krycek? What happened to my fish?",
Mulder asked nervously.
"Oh, I forgot to tell you ... the drain
doesn't work right ... water barely stays in it for too long.",
explained Krycek, lying.
"B-but ... my fish.", said Mulder as
he got into the tub on his hands and knees, looking down the drain.
Krycek walks into the room and rolls his eyes
at Mulder, who is making 'fish lips' at the drain.
"I'm sorry Mulder. You never gave me the
chance to tell ya." He said, pulling Mulder up and out of the
That night, Krycek thought to himself whether
or not returning the fish would be the best thing to do. Would they
live longer under his care? Heck, he'll just give them back to Mulder
on his birthday ... that's what friends are for .... kinda .... he
just won't tell him it's his three fish.